It's interesting being a father now. Of course I'd say that, I'm a father now. While I was able to prepare certain aspects of my life for being a parent there were certain things I was totally unprepared for.
For instance the way my daughter's eyes, even at just 5 weeks old follow me and look for me when she hears my voice. How sometimes when my wife can't seem to calm her down, she really does just want daddy.
When Cora was born via C-Section I was given the chance to hold her first. After she'd been cleaned up some and examined by the doctors, weighed, etc. I sat back down and they handed her to me, swaddled in clean blankets. I'll never forget the moment the assisting physician showed her to us the first time, or that moment holding her for the first time in the hospital. She began to whimper and cry, and Sydney said, "Sing to her, sing her song." So I began, "Cora Sue, won't you come out tonight,, won't you come out tonight..." just a little bit, just as we had been jokingly singing to her for weeks while she was still in the womb. She immediately stopped crying and looked up at me.
Now at home, I love to lay on the floor next to her, and watch her as she looks at toys suspended above her, or seems to make an attempt to reach out for me or Sydney when we lay beside her. Tummy time is also a priority, and I have to say I'm a proud father when I see those little arms do a mini pushup or that head successfully turn from one side to the other.
I know that this is just the beginning, we're only creeping up on six weeks at home, and I can already see how much she's changed from the pictures we took in the hospital. It makes me wonder how much more she'll change in the next year, the next five years, and on. I look forward to every minute of it. I know there are times when it's not fun, it's challenging, we've already run into those with some crying and gas pains in the evenings. Still though, she's a well behaved baby, and I hope for our sake she stays that way throughout her young life.
I woke up early one morning a few weeks ago, raised my head and looked at Cora asleep in her bed, Sydney lying beside me and just looked around the room. I thought to myself, what else is there, really? I have never been more content or happy in my life, I don't know how we lived without this child for so long, or how life could be any better. We've endured much in the past year, but we now know it all lead us to this place, and this is better than we ever could have imagined.